Passages from the Life of a Philosopher

Various Classes injured — Instruments of Torture — Encouragers; Servants, Beer-shops, Children, Ladies of elastic virtue — Effects on the Musical Profession — Retaliation — Police themselves disturbed — Invalids distracted — Horses run away — Children run over — A Cab-stand placed in the Author’s street attracts Organs — Mobs shouting out his Name — Threats to Burn his House — Disturbed in the middle of the night when very ill — An average number of Persons are always ill — Hence always disturbed — Abusive Placards — Great Difficulty of getting Convictions — Got a Case for the Queen’s Bench — Found it useless — A Dead Sell — Another Illustration — Musicians give False Name and Address — Get Warrant for Apprehension — They keep out of the way — Offenders not yet found and arrested by the Police — Legitimate Use of Highways — An Old Lawyer’s Letter to The Times — Proposed Remedies; Forbid entirely — Authorize Police to seize the Instrument and take it to the Station — An Association for Prevention of Street Music proposed. DURING the last ten years, the amount of street music has so greatly increased that it has now become a positive nuisance to a very considerable portion of the inhabitants of London. It robs the industrious man of his time; it annoys the musical man by its intolerable badness; it irritates the invalid; deprives the patient, who at great inconvenience has visited London for the best medical advice, of that repose which, under such circumstances, is essential for his recovery, and it destroys the time and the energies of all the in­tel­lec­tual classes of society by its continual in­ter­rup­tions of their pursuits. {338} Instruments of torture permitted by the Government to be in daily and nightly use in the streets of London. Organs. Brass bands. Fiddles. Harps. Harpsichords. Hurdy-gurdies. Flageolets. Drums. Bagpipes. Accordions. Halfpenny whistles. Tom-toms. Trumpets. The human voice in various forms. Shouting out objects for sale. Religious canting. Psalm-singing. I have very frequently been disturbed by such music after eleven and even after twelve o’clock at night. Upon one occasion a brass band played, with but few and short intermissions, for five hours. Encouragers of Street Music. Tavern-keepers. Public-houses. Gin-shops. Beer-shops. Coffee-shops. Servants. Children. Visitors from the country. Ladies of doubtful virtue. Oc­ca­sion­al­ly titled ladies; but these are almost invariably of recent elevation, and deficient in that taste which their sex usually possess. The habit of frequenting public-houses, and the amount of intoxication, is much augmented by these means. It therefore finds support from the whole body of licensed victuallers, and from all those who are interested, as the proprietors of public-houses. The great encouragers of street music belong chiefly to the lower classes of society. Of these, the frequenters of public-houses and beer-shops patronize the worst and the most {339} noisy kinds of music. The proprietors of such establishments find it a very successful means of attracting customers. Music is kept up for a longer time, and at later hours, before the public-house, than under any other circumstances. It not unfrequently gives rise to a dance by little ragged urchins, and sometimes by half-intoxicated men, who oc­ca­sion­al­ly accompany the noise with their own discordant voices. Servants and children are great admirers of street music; also people from the country, who, coming up to town for a short time, often encourage it. Another class who are great supporters of street music, consists of ladies of elastic virtue and cosmopolitan tendencies, to whom it affords a decent excuse for displaying their fascinations at their own open windows. Most ladies resident in London are aware of this peculiarity, but oc­ca­sion­al­ly some few to whom it is not known have found very unpleasant inferences drawn, in consequence of thus gratifying their musical taste. MUSICAL PERFORMERS. Musicians. Instruments. Italians Organs. Germans Brass bands. Natives of India Tom-toms. English Brass bands, fiddles, &c. The lowest class of clubs Bands with double drum. The most numerous of these classes, the organ-grinders, are natives of Italy, chiefly from the mountainous district, whose language is a rude patois, and who are entirely unacquainted with any other. It is said that there are above a thousand of these foreigners usually in London employed in tormenting the natives. They mostly reside in {340} the neighbourhood of Saffron Hill, and are, of course, from their ignorance of any other language than their own, entirely in the hands of their padrones. One of these, a most persevering intruder with his organ, gave me a false address. Having ascertained the real address, he was sought for by the police for above a fortnight, but not discovered. His padrone becoming aware of his being “wanted,” sent him on a country circuit. I once met, within a few miles of the Land’s End, one of these fellows whom I had frequently sent away from my own street. The amount of in­ter­rup­tion from street music, and from other occasional noises, varies with the nature and the habits of its victims. Those whose minds are entirely unoccupied receive it with sat­is­fac­tion, as filling up the vacuum of time. Those whose thoughts are chiefly occupied with frivolous pursuits or with any other pursuits requiring but little attention from the reasoning or the reflective powers, readily attend to occasional street music. Those who possess an impaired bodily frame, and whose misery might be alleviated by good music at proper intervals, are absolutely driven to distraction by the vile and discordant music of the streets waking them, at all hours, in the midst of that temporary repose so necessary for confirmed invalids. By pro­fes­sion­al musicians its effects are most severely felt. It interrupts them in their own studies, and entirely destroys the value of the in­struc­tions they are giving their domestic pupils. When they leave their own house to give lessons to their employers, the “infernal” organ still pursues them. Their Belgravian employer is obliged, at every lesson, to bribe the itinerant miscreant to desist—his charge for this act of mercy being from a shilling to half-a-crown for each lesson. {341} It is, however, right to hint to the members of the musical profession, that their immediate neighbours do not quite so much enjoy even the most exquisite pro­fes­sion­al music when filtered through brick walls, or trans­mit­ted circuitously and partially through open windows into the houses of their neighbours. I know of no remedy to propose for the benefit of the latter class, but I think that a proper self-respect should induce the pro­fes­sion­al musician himself to close his windows, and even to suffer the inconvenience of heat, rather than permanently annoy his neighbours. The law of retaliation, which is only justified when other arguments fail, was curiously put in force in a case which was brought under my notice a few years ago. An artist of considerable eminence, who resided in the west end of London, had for many a year pursued his own undisturbed and undisturbing studies, when one fine morning his pro­fes­sion­al studies were interrupted by the continuous sound of music trans­mit­ted through the wall from his neighbour’s house. Finding the noise continuous and his in­ter­rup­tion complete, he rang for his servant, and putting his maul into the man’s hand desired him to continue knocking against the wall from whence the disturbance proceeded until he returned from a walk in the Park. He added that he should probably be absent for an hour, and that if any person called and wished to see him, he should be at home at the end of that time. On his return he was informed that the new tenant of the adjacent house had called during his absence, and that on being informed of the hour of his master’s return, he had expressed his intention of calling again. A short time after this the new tenant of the adjacent house was introduced. He apologized for this visit to a stranger, but said that during the last hour he had been annoyed by a most extraordinary knocking {342} against the wall, which entirely interrupted his pro­fes­sion­al pursuits. To this the artist replied in almost precisely the same words, that during the previous hour he had been annoyed by a most extraordinary and unusual sound which entirely interrupted his pro­fes­sion­al pursuits. After some discussion it was settled that the piano should be removed to the opposite wall, and that it should be covered with a stratum of blankets. This arrangement went on for a few months; but the pupils and their relatives disapproving of a dumb piano gradually left the professor, who found it desirable to give up the house and retire to a more music-tolerating neighbourhood. In this case the evil was equal on both sides, and it was reasonable that the new comer should retire. In my own case it has often been suggested to me to retaliate; and as many of my in­ter­rup­tions have been intentional, that course might be justifiable. But as they have been confined to one or two of the lowest persons in the neighbourhood, I thought it not right to disturb my more respectable neighbours. The means at my command for producing the most hideously discordant noises are ample, having a considerable collection of shrill organ pipes, with appropriate bellows, and an indefatigable steam engine ever ready to work them whilst I might be “taking a walk in the Park.” I hope by the timely amendment of the law no person may be driven to practise what it refuses to prevent, and thus test the laws of the country by the reductio ad absurdum. It is difficult to estimate the misery inflicted upon thousands of persons, and the absolute pecuniary penalty imposed upon multitudes of in­tel­lec­tual workers by the loss of their time, destroyed by organ-grinders and other similar nuisances. I have witnessed much and suffered more; many {343} communications on the subject have reached me, and I fear that I may appear to have neglected several of them. I hope, however, that the great sacrifice of my own time, which has been forced upon me in order to secure the remainder, may be accepted as my excuse. I will now mention some few of the results. Even policemen have frequently told me that organs are a great nuisance to them personally. A large number of the police are constantly on night duty, and of course these can only get their sleep during the day. On such occasions their rest is constantly broken by the nuisance of street music. A lady, the wife of an officer on half-pay, writes to me, stating her own sad case. Her husband, suffering under a painfully nervous affection, is brought up to London for the benefit of medical advice. Under these circumstances a sensible improvement takes place, but it requires time and constant attention to advance the cure. In order to profit by the eminent skill which London supplies, the lady and her husband, at considerable sacrifice, take a very small house in a very quiet little square. Unfortunately, the organ-grinders had possession of it, and no entreaties would banish them. The irritation produced on the invalid was frightful, and I feel it some relief not to have known its almost inevitable termination. Various accidents occur as the consequence of street music. It oc­ca­sion­al­ly happens that horses are frightened, and perhaps their riders thrown; that carriages are run away with, and their occupiers dreadfully alarmed and possibly even bruised. The following casualties were reported, about three years ago, in most of the daily newspapers:— “SHOCKING OCCURRENCE.—SIX CHILDREN RUN OVER AND MUTILATED.—Yesterday afternoon, shortly after four o’clock, a German band, whilst {344} performing in the Old St. Pancras Road, was the cause of a most dreadful accident. At the time mentioned, the band referred to was playing at the